Published Sunday, Dec. 07, 2003

NO MUSS, NO FUSS: No, the Dog Lamp will never require a pooper scooper or drool on your furniture.
NO MUSS, NO FUSS: No, the Dog Lamp will never require a pooper scooper or drool on your furniture.

DOG LAMP

$49.98 plus shipping and handling from Taylor Gifts, 600 Cedar Hollow Rd., Paoli, Pa. 19301, phone: 800-829-1133, Internet: www.taylorgifts.com

Suggested by Maralu Frost of Red Creek, N.Y.

Here is a lovely and tasteful gift for the person who would love to have a dog for companionship, but is not interested in the more biological aspects of the dog, such as eating, barking, drooling, having sex with your leg and attempting to make weewee on every square inch of the planet.

This is an almost semi-lifelike dog statuette that doubles as an attractive and practical lamp. Picture the scene: It's a rainy evening, and you're snug in your living room, reading by the light of your dog. From time to time you look up from your book and say: ''Do you want to go out, Scamp?'' But Scamp never does. Good Scamp!

And if, later that night, a burglar enters your home, you can use Scamp to club him on the head. You can even take Scamp for a walk, if you have a really long extension cord.

NEXT GIFT: 'LOVE TRIANGLE' TURKEY DECOY SET


THE GIFTS  
  • BOWEL BUDDY BRAN WAFERS
  • CAFFEINATED SOAP
  • HAIR-CUTTING UMBRELLA
  • NAP-STRAP AIRLINE PASSENGER HEAD-RESTRAINT DEVICE
  • BIRD DIAPERS
  • OCTODOG FRANKFURTER CONVERTER
  • SOFT CLAWS COLORED NAIL CAPS FOR CATS
  • PRESIDENTIAL ACTION FIGURES
  • TALKING TOILET-PAPER DISPENSER
  • BUBBLE BUDDY BACON-FLAVORED DOG BUBBLES
  • EXECUTIVE LAPTOP STEERING WHEEL MOUNT
  • FOOD SUIT
  • GIFT GUIDE LITERARY SELECTION
  • DOGGLES
  • DOG LAMP
  • 'LOVE TRIANGLE' TURKEY DECOY SET
  • BACK TO MAIN PAGE
  •